Knowing myself, its not surprising that I did not post a blog in here for more that half a year (the selection of calling 6 months as "half a yr" is a deliberate attempt to enhance the larger time frame gone past)...yeah so no blog since aug last year, guess I was just keeping busy (not literally) but yes i was busy living the monotony of my monotonously monotoned life. Zilch!!!
It intrigues me to think at this hour of the night how I am traveling in some sort of a time machine - travelling between thoughts, perceptions, ideas, opinions, desires and maybe happiness in general. And on this fine hour I am shocked and rather surprised to realise that I am where I never imagined life would take me - A mental condition I believed was hypothetical, well, I am suffering from it - the agonies of being a fully grown adult.
How has life changed for me is rather funny but true yeah. There was a time when I used to wonder how people can be crazy enough to diet..when my chocolates were rationed, my bowl full of kaju-kishmish supply was limited to filling my blazer pockets while walking to the school bus stop..how I would finish infinite mithai in the fridge and leave the empty bowl inside so that later bhai could be blamed. Today, (I still don't diet though), I know about the different types of diet and the concept of the metabolic rate of body crap! Then, the Rs 10 dairy milk bar was worth drooling over and now, the heart filling temptation to finish an entire box of Ferrero Rochers is looked down upon.
Me moving from BMI normal to overweight is not important (ideally should be) but what worries me is that how the affordability has taken away the small pleasures of living. This feeling sunk in the most when few weeks back I met a very close friend after a considerable time gap. He wasn't sad or something but ya, I could not locate any zeal or enthusiasm in him and that's what i missed. Which species of mind tree is flourishing inside him and me aswell? I asked him and he gave me the same answer a billion other people would. No, I don't miss being a kid or school days...this phase of life is actually good but ya I hate how each tomorrow is identical to the yesterday. The death of "looking forward" to stupidities of life is rather hurting.
I dislike how my friends always have the same questions to ask and the same answers to give.
I find it strange how weekends are the most sought after days of the months, week and years.
I miss the vagueness the life had...being randomly "lukha" and indulging in wise but extremely senseless discussions.
I miss chatting with bhai till very late in the night and then being scolded by maa...I simply miss dad being strict and then me cribbing about it.
In fact, i cant recall the last time I had heard a really bad PJ from someone and i had wanted to kill the person for the same. I hate witnessing the lives in loops and entangled. My eternal love for my friends still prevails though the eternity has strangely gone missing.
Am not cribbing...I believe i am transiting between childhood and adulthood, so currently am stuck in some type of HOOD - morbidhood or may be moronhood. I detest this constipated growth...compressed world...adiabatic conditions of life, relationships, food, living, arguments, discussions, decisions, friendships, worries, planning etc etc- White background with Black text in Times New Roman 12 - AS IT IS.
P.S : Unity in the diversified lives - personified
